Each Thursday, the Tulsa World’s unique treasure, “The Picker”, takes a stab at predicting some of the weekend’s college and pro games. While The Picker clearly has solid football knowledge, what sets him apart is his laugh-out-loud commentary.
Two of the funniest college football coaches were Steve Spurrier and Lou Holtz. Their memorable quips were accumulated over long careers (evidently, South Carolina liked hiring coaches with terrific senses of humor).
In contrast, check out some of the Picker’s gems from solely one day, last Thursday:
On Jim Harbaugh: During offseasons, he walks taller than Chuck Norris and Buford Pusser rolled into one. During games, he soils himself.
On the LA Chargers playing during the pandemic: They should benefit as they should feel right at home playing in an empty stadium.
Why Bill Belichick loves the cardboard cutouts in empty stadiums: Many more opportunities to hide spy cameras.
Miami (Florida) and Texas are the Coy and Vance Duke of college football. We wonder when and if the actual dudes are coming back. (This was written before Miami’s resounding triumph at Louisville which indicates that at least one of the Dukes may be returning).
The Picker decries the piped-in artificial noise, saying that the simulated crowd noise is as artificial as the annual dose of pre-season hype for the Dallas Cowboys.
That, my friends, is clear evidence of a national treasure.
The Picker has totally infiltrated the soul of the Odyssey. When the San Diego State Aztecs made the incredible, hard-to-believe news that their home games in 2020 and 2021 would be at the infamous Carson soccer stadium that housed the Chargers after their dreaded escape from San Diego, our first reaction was “Is this some type of sick joke”? Our second reaction: The Picker would have a field day with this material!